{"id":264,"date":"2011-04-15T09:36:04","date_gmt":"2011-04-15T15:36:04","guid":{"rendered":"https:\/\/desertwind.us\/blog\/?p=264"},"modified":"2011-04-18T09:23:20","modified_gmt":"2011-04-18T15:23:20","slug":"dadkilledtheeasterbunny","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/desertwind.us\/blog\/2011\/04\/dadkilledtheeasterbunny\/","title":{"rendered":"The year Dad ran over the Rabbit."},"content":{"rendered":"<p>Dad is a truck driver. A long-haul driver for most of my childhood, he was often unable to make it home on the day everyone else celebrated a holiday.<\/p>\n<p>We therefore became accustomed, over the years, to writing letters to Santa and the Easter Bunny:<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<div style=\"width: 364px\" class=\"wp-caption aligncenter\"><a href=\"https:\/\/desertwind.us\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/04\/santa-letter.jpg\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" style=\"background-image: none; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; display: inline; padding-top: 0px; border: 0px initial initial;\" title=\"I'm surprised I even bothered to sign the other children's names.\" src=\"https:\/\/desertwind.us\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/04\/santa-letter_thumb.jpg\" border=\"0\" alt=\"I'm surprised I even bothered to sign the other children's names. \" width=\"354\" height=\"471\" \/><\/a><p class=\"wp-caption-text\">Even little kids understand the power of, well, let\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s just call them incentives.<\/p><\/div>\n<p>Did I mention my dad drives a BIG truck? It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s important to keep this in mind.<\/p>\n<p>If you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve been around children on the night before a holiday, you know that there is a special sort of magic in the air. This particular Easter took place a week late, in 1982.*\u00c2\u00a0 Picture, if you will, four sweet little children (\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Sweet\u00e2\u20ac\u009d as in, \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Bless their <em>sweet <\/em>little hearts\u00e2\u20ac\u009d**) ranging in age from 2-6 years old.\u00c2\u00a0 We\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ve just finished dyeing the table, each other, and by a remarkable feat of effort on the part of our parents, most of the eggs.\u00c2\u00a0 Conversation has naturally turned to cataloguing potential hiding places\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6<\/p>\n<ul>\n<li>Barbecuer? Yes.<\/li>\n<li>Truck bumper? That&#8217;s a given.<\/li>\n<li>Wheel well on the Blazer? It could go either way.<\/li>\n<li>And every child in our family for three generations knows that the Bunny has a weirdly obsessive compulsion to stick an egg in the end of the clothesline T-post. It\u00e2\u20ac\u2122s in his genetic makeup and has to do with the relationship between rabbits and holes***. I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m a scientist so you can believe me in this.<\/li>\n<\/ul>\n<p style=\"padding-left: 150px;\"><a href=\"https:\/\/desertwind.us\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/04\/Clothesline1.jpg\"><img decoding=\"async\" loading=\"lazy\" class=\"aligncenter\" style=\"background-image: none; padding-left: 0px; padding-right: 0px; display: inline; padding-top: 0px; border: 0px;\" title=\"It's the law.\" src=\"https:\/\/desertwind.us\/blog\/wp-content\/uploads\/2011\/04\/Clothesline_thumb1.jpg\" border=\"0\" alt=\"It's the law.\" width=\"354\" height=\"265\" \/><\/a><\/p>\n<p>\u00e2\u20ac\u00a6when dad looks up from removing his last egg and says,<\/p>\n<p>\u00e2\u20ac\u0153Oh, I don\u00e2\u20ac\u2122t think you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122ll have to look for eggs tomorrow. I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m pretty sure I ran over the Easter Bunny on Sunday.\u00c2\u00a0 About yay high, wears a bow-tie?&#8221;<\/p>\n<p>He looks from child to stricken child.<\/p>\n<p>&#8220;Yeah, I\u00e2\u20ac\u2122m pretty sure it was him.\u00e2\u20ac\u009d<\/p>\n<p>And this, folks, is how you create those special family memories that last a lifetime.<\/p>\n<p>Stay tuned to a future post to find out how you can traumatize your child at Christmas with just a chimney and an old Don Knotts\/Tim Conway movie. Wookalars may be involved, but I don&#8217;t want to spoil the surprise.<\/p>\n<p>&nbsp;<\/p>\n<p><em>*Which I believe is the year before classmate Rachel told me the truth about the Rabbit and the Big Guy in the Red Suit. It was a conversation I purposefully and successfully managed to repress for several more years, having come to the realization that, as the oldest child, holidays would be much less magical when my parents found out they had a \u00e2\u20ac\u0153Little Helper\u00e2\u20ac\u009d. Finding the hidden Easter eggs is much more efficient but decidedly less exciting when you\u00e2\u20ac\u2122re the one who hid them.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>** This was mainly true of those who knew us, and of our propensity to do things like break into the house paint of a morning, and color coordinate ourselves and the deep freeze with our home&#8217;s exterior. Or to dig out the Christmas lights and joyfully stomp on them one at a time. Pop! Pop! Pop! \u00c2\u00a0It&#8217;s like stomping on mud cracks but with that extra little thrill that comes with the growing certainty that you are in\u00c2\u00a0imminent\u00c2\u00a0danger. No, not from broken glass. From Mom.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em>*** You may have thought I would say something else here. Shame on you.<\/em><\/p>\n<p><em><br \/>\n<\/em><\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>Dad is a truck driver. A long-haul driver for most of my childhood, he was often unable to make it home on the day everyone else celebrated a holiday. We therefore became accustomed, over the years, to writing letters to Santa and the Easter Bunny: &nbsp; Did I mention my dad drives a BIG truck? &#038;hellip <a class=\"read-excerpt\" href=\"https:\/\/desertwind.us\/blog\/2011\/04\/dadkilledtheeasterbunny\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"meta-nav\">&raquo;<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":2,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"_mi_skip_tracking":false},"categories":[76],"tags":[77,75],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/desertwind.us\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/264"}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/desertwind.us\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/desertwind.us\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/desertwind.us\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/2"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/desertwind.us\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=264"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/desertwind.us\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/264\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/desertwind.us\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=264"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/desertwind.us\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=264"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/desertwind.us\/blog\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=264"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}<!-- WP Super Cache is installed but broken. 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